


Beautiful

by Sofipitch



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-20 00:16:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7383289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sofipitch/pseuds/Sofipitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pearl found herself pulling Amethyst into her lap and Amethyst was suddenly clutching Pearl, letting out loud clumsy sobs, and Pearl rocked her back and forth because she knew, this was the one thing she did know.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> “Your skin  
> Oh yeah your skin and bones  
> Turn into something beautiful  
> You know you know I love you so  
> You know I love you so”  
> -Yellow, Coldplay

            Pearl tried to shield herself from it. There were times when yes, she had thought more of her, but she had tried not too.

            There was something too complicated in that thinking. She could never…

            Pearl was still in love with Rose.

            Maybe she wouldn’t ever stop loving her. And she couldn’t do that to Amethyst. She had devoted herself, and now was stuck in a stagnant pond, water pooling around her, drowning her and she didn’t know if she even really wanted to be in love with Rose anymore.

It just hurt her too much.

……

            When she finally came out of that hole, Pearl waited in anticipation at what Amethyst might do. Maybe she would need something else from her. The speech she had given her had not in any way felt adequate. It was hard for Pearl to surmise how she felt about Amethyst. She herself had not yet figured it out.

            But Amethyst had grabbed her, slamming herself face first into Pearl and once she had gotten over the initial surprise, Pearl held her back.

            Nothing had felt better than that moment, holding Amethyst in her arms. She had held her, carried her, hugged her when they had been younger, nothing new there, but something had drastically changed and during late nights when there was nothing to do Pearl would think back to that moment.

            Maybe Pearl was falling in love again.

_Maybe._

……

Sometimes she did things, made fun of Pearl, included her, hugged her even though she was covered in gross green goop. It was a special attention that Amethyst gave her, not direct, just something that one would notice out of the corner of ones eye. If she were to describe it, Pearl would simply say that Amethyst didn’t treat her the same way she does Garnet.

Nor does she treat Amethyst the same as Garnet, but that is no reason to get her hopes up.

……

 

            Ever since they had fought Peridot Amethyst had not been feeling well. Amethyst had resorted to her usual pushing people away and aloofness but Pearl could not even stand the idea of her hating herself.

            _“Like you could ever catch me! You’re just an experiment gone wrong.”_

            It had hurt Pearl, but not in the same way Amethyst was probably hurting.

            She made the dangerous venture into Amethyst’s room, trying to find her, just because she didn’t want Amethyst to have to go through that on her own. Pearl wanted to be there for her, as she had been last time.

            She found her curled into a ball partially covered by a couch that was tipped over frontwards.

            “Amethyst…” Pearl cooed as she sat down next to Amethyst, putting a tentative hand on the top of her head.

            Amethyst’s position loosened, and she turned her head to look at Pearl, her wet blurry eye slightly obscured by her wild hair.

            Suddenly Pearl was at loss for words. She had had a whole speech planned out in her mind, exactly what she was going to say to Amethyst.

            With one look her script went out the window.

            Pearl found herself pulling Amethyst into her lap and Amethyst was suddenly clutching Pearl, letting out loud clumsy sobs, and Pearl rocked her back and forth because she knew, this was the one thing she did know.

            Pearl felt her hands in Amethyst’s hair and herself whispering, “I’m sorry Amethyst. I don’t know why Peridot would say such an awful thing. None of us, not Garnet, Steven, or I think that of you.”

            Amethyst’s sobbing slowed so that she could speak. “That doesn’t make it not real.”

            Pearl didn’t think.

            Instead she pulled back from Amethyst’s embrace so that she could look at her, cupping her cheeks in her hands. Although Amethyst was trying to advert her gaze, Pearl caught it. “I would never think that of you. I-I….” she was trying very hard but to look directly into Amethyst’s watery eyes was hard. “You’re my friend, Amethyst.”

            Amethyst was still sobbing and for a second Pearl thought her words had had no affect when suddenly Pearl was jerked forward as Amethyst clung to her.

            As Pearl held Amethyst she found herself whispering, “You’re my best friend.”

            Amethyst pulled away from Pearl and spoke. She had stopped crying but her face was still stained with the tracks the tears had made down her face. Pearl brushed them away with her thumb. Her voice was very quiet, almost a whisper spoken with an adverted gaze. “Really? You’re best friend?” then under her breath, “coulda’ gotten yourself a better one.”

            Pearl hugged Amethyst with a sudden fierceness at hearing her whispered words, not being able to stand them. “You are my best friend.” _Maybe I love you._ “And you know,” Pearl tilted her head to Amethyst’s head, which was nestled under her chin. Each of Pearl’s words breathed into Amethyst’s hair. “I think I made a very good choice my best friend. I certainly wouldn’t want another.” _I don’t understand how I feel around you most of the time but I care you too much for you to put yourself down like that._

            Ever so slightly, Pearl places a kiss on Amethyst’s head, passing it off as just resting her face on top of Amethyst’s head. It was probably light enough that Amethyst didn’t even feel it.

……

            Pearl held Amethyst for what felt like days. They talked and sometimes they cried. Pearl rocked Amethyst in her arms and at one point Amethyst’s face brushed against her shoulder and Pearl couldn’t tell if she had actually felt a kiss or if she was just making it up.

            Amethyst was the first to let go, with the prepared excuse of needing to check up on Steven. Pearl said she was right and let go of Amethyst, but found herself watching her every move as they went back to the house. How had she never noticed how beautiful she was?

 

            All Pearl could think of was why they didn’t do that more often.

            _I’m sorry. I think I’m in love with you._


End file.
